It is a Privilege
It’s a commendable thing to even see your barrenness in the first place. There are some women and men who may not be able to have a baby, but they are not bothered by it. And so they are not going to be too desperate in their barrenness. Maybe others would be selfish and really would not want to have babies anyway. It is one thing not to be able to have a baby, but it is another thing to feel the pain and the grief of barrenness. You have felt it, and it is a good thing from God’s hand to feel those things, but it’s so easy to get through a hard time and come out on the other side of it, and kind of sigh, “I am glad that that is over,” and go on to the next thing. But you don’t let it really strike all the way to the depths of your heart and soul of who you really are apart from God.
It is really a blessing and a privilege to see yourself as a barren-wombed person. See it as a blessing and a privilege from God because it is an indication of His devotedness and commitment to your life. It is the only way that you are ever going to know supernatural life coming out of you, to first see your barrenness- to come to those points in time. They don’t have to be rare opportunities. They can be when you see that you just don’t have the right response. Those things are not there, and frankly you are not contented with it, and you know that it is not Jesus. But there has got to be something inside of you that is crying out for more. To sing out in the midst of barrenness, you have got to feel the pain of it first. You have got to feel the grit of the whole thing, and the pain, and the rejection, and the total poverty that you have. It is so easy in our human frame to gloss over it, to get over it, to fill the void with something else, to placate ourselves, to make ourselves feel better by going to have a burger, or playing sports, or talking with so and so. It is so easy to avoid the whole thing, to put it on the back burner, and to get through the hard times- but then to not really get to the bottom of what God is trying to show us.
We are very blessed and privileged when we allow God to take us all the way to the core of the thing and we allow Him to strip our eyes from the blinders of seeing ourselves. It is a rare thing for people to see all the way to the depths of their heart and respond in faith to a loving Father, and seeing it as coming from His loving hand as part of His devotion and commitment to your life, and your walk with His Son. And all the wonderful things that He is wanting to do in your life, and through your life, this is part of the path and part of the commitment. It is a blessing and a privilege to see a barren womb, to feel the pain of a barren womb, and that we know what it is all about, and that we let God show us, and we don’t fill the lack with something other than Jesus. It’s easy to do that, to fill the lack. You see it is not there, and you try to cover it up, or you have some kind of false baby through the whole thing. It is possible to do that in your spiritual walk with God, to fill it in with some thing that works, that makes you feel better- the good things we have done today, to somehow soften the whole effect. Feel the pain, and in that, see the reason that it is a blessing and privilege, because it is only those people who are going to experience the magnitude of the life of Jesus in a way that will really bring glory to God the Father, and to the Son. The measure to which you let God take you through those times and feel the pain, is the measure to which you will express the life of God in the world around you, to the people around you that you love and care about, to your children and to your spouse, and anybody else that you meet. The degree to which you let yourself go through those things, and you sing to God, and you rejoice in those things, is the measure to which God will be able to bless you and pour His life through you in a very real and powerful way.
And that is where all the faith comes in. “God, You are going to do this, and my barrenness is not indication that You are not committed, it is indication that I need You, and You are going to do a miracle in me because You promised that You would. You are my only Hope, and the only reason that You brought me to this point is for me to see that You are my only Hope, and my only Way, that Your life is going to be expressed through me, by You doing it.” Cry out to God and believe Him for it, and then respond to the next thing, which says to enlarge the place of your tent, with faith, because you believe that God is going to do this miracle inside of you. And you are enlarging the place of your tent, and making everything stronger, and not holding back. You are doing that long before you even see the thing happen. Throw yourself onto Him in faith, and with much heart and with much gladness and expectation of what the Father is going to do. Your are not shrinking back from the thing. You are going to believe Him for it all the way home. And you are not going to fill in your own lack with anything less than having the manifested Son of God expressing himself in your life.
So it really is a blessing and a privilege to be able to see yourself the way that God sees you, so that He can do something really marvelous and special through you and in you to the Father’s glory. To the people around you, and in the body of Christ, lift up the light and the love and the person of His Son. So let yourself be taken all the way down that road. Don’t put it on the back burner. Don’t just get through it, so you can then go on with a more pleasant life. Don’t let that happen, if you are in the habit of it. And don’t get faithless either. Look to Him, saying, “Okay, You are trying to get my attention. Now is the time for me to rejoice and to believe You, that You are devoted and committed to me. I am thanking You for this, and I will praise You in spite of it.”